Grammar
by SinsofMidnight
Summary: Reno goes to a bar after an ordinary day at the office and overhears something Elena says. Hilarity ensues, and he challenges her. Tseng's the test subject. There be Yaoi to be had, and lemons too! Reno/Tseng


**Grammar**

**_Fandom: _**_Final Fantasy VII_

**_Inspiration/Prompt:_**_ "He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head."_

**_Rating: _**_M_

**_Warnings:  
_**_-Yaoi  
-Alcohol  
-Rough play (at points, but not too rough)  
-Dumb fic name puns  
-A tendency to use the prompt line in text  
-Elena bashing (slight, but there)_

**_Main Pairing: _**_Reno/Tseng_

**_Minor Pairings Mentioned:  
_**_-Cloud/Tifa  
-(almost) Reno/Tifa  
-(past) Tseng/Elena_

**_Setting: _**_Cannon, for once. Set after Advent Children_

**_POV: _**_Written primarily in Reno's POV, but the last part is in Tseng's!_

**_Summary:_**_ Reno goes to a bar after an ordinary day at the office and overhears something Elena says. Hilarity ensues, and he challenges her. Tseng's the test subject._

**_Additional ANs: _**_This fic ended up being for my Sammi's birthday (on dA, she's dereksgirl)_

* * *

_Reno:_

"Reno," Tseng asked, sighing, "how did this happen?"

I shrugged. "I donno know, yo."

Dark eyes shot mine. "Grammar, Reno," he scolded without heat.

My grammar had somehow become a comfortable banter between us. He'd correct me, and I'd smirk and shrug it off. It simply emphasized the differences between us. Tseng was educated, manicured, controlled, charming and smooth. I grew up on the streets and I'm not sure the total of my education would even add up to a high school diploma. And the nicest words used to describe me have been "coarse", "flamboyant", "sarcastic", and "moody". We were opposites, even our body builds –we were both musceled enough, but he actually _looked _it while I still looked somewhat scrawny– and hair colors.

He gave a small smile at my thoughtful expression. _Damn_, he was beautiful when he smiled. "What are you thinking, Reno?"

"Nothin' important, boss."

"Then your paperwork awaits your undivided attention," he directed.

I nearly groaned. I hate paperwork. But I left his office without complaint for once and headed for my desk.

My partner nodded to me briefly in acknowledgment as I settled in to do paperwork. Oh, the joys of paperwork.

* * *

_Reno:_

Two hours later, I finished my paperwork and dozed off on my desk. I was beginning to fall into a deeper sleep when slender, warm hands rested on my shoulders.

Warm breath caressed the curve of my ear and I suppressed an aroused shiver. "Reno," a smooth voice called out softly, "it's time to leave."

It took me a few seconds to place the voice. Tseng. "Mmm," I murmured, rousing from my sleep as I felt him draw away from me.

"Maybe you should get more sleep, Reno," Tseng commanded as I awoke fully.

"M'by," I returned. "But right now I just need outta here."

* * *

_Reno:_

As it happened, I ended up at usual club, nursing a beer at the bar and fending off advances from the drunk man beside me.

Elena and Tifa sat together a small table. I seized the opportunity to get away from my problem, and sauntered over just in time to hear Elena say, "Tseng doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head!"

Her comment struck me hard. She wasn't the only person in the office who wanted to bed the boss. Honestly, I had wanted him from the moment I met him, but you don't give your boss that kind of leverage if you can help it. But, since I also wanted him, I couldn't stop my snarky reply. "Then you're not doing it right, sugar," I purred out.

Elena looked up, indignant, and Tifa shot me secret smile, telling me I'd saved her from making a similar remark. "I'll have you know I'd never gotten a complaint!" He Elena fumed.

"No complaints just means you're doin' a decent job, yo. A good job would render even Tseng unable to form a grammatically correct sentence."

"And you can do a better job?" She challenged.

My smirk grew. "Hell yeah, Lena. I know what men like, and I should, bein' a guy 'n all. And I'm pretty sure I've had more practice than ya."

She turned about the same shade as my hair, whether in embarrassment or fury, I don't know. "Reno, you're gay?"

I gave her an 'are-you-really-that-stupid' look. "Lena, the only way I could been more obvious about it is by wearing a name tag that says 'I'm gay; ask me how!' "

Tifa burst out laughing at that. Elena glared at her. "Well, hell, Elena, Reno's got a point. He never hid his sexuality. And he likes to hit on Cloud because it gets his goat."

"Do I _want_ to know what you're talking about?" Tseng asked, apparently coming to the table in time to catch only the last sentence.

"Prob'ly not, boss," I returned.

"Elena challenged Reno, saying he couldn't give a better blowjob than her," Tifa informed him, a twinkle in her dark eyes. "Reno said he could. Wanna be their test subject?"

Tseng's eyes widened.

Elena turned red yet again. "How did this happen?" she asked whoever was listening.

I shrugged. "I'll back down if ya want, 'Lena, seeing as you didn't know."

"Know what?" Tseng asked, hesitant receive another bombshell.

"Reno's gay," Tifa informed, like she was just telling him how the weather had been lately.

Tseng choked on the beer I hadn't realized he had. "What?!"

Tifa smiled serenely. "Yep, the redhead's gay. Damn man even turned me down once."

I almost blushed at the memory. She'd been trashed, so I'd let her think what she liked only to take her to my place and let her pass out on the couch. I couldn't just leave her there and let people take advantage of her! People tend to perceive me as a bastard, but I really care as much as our favorite mopey blond. "Sorry, Ti. You're not quite my type, yo. You were piss-drunk anyway, and I don't like ta take advantage of people."

"And I knew better sober," she added.

A hand took a firm hold on one of my shoulders. "Excuse us, ladies. We have something we need to discuss." Tseng's tone was curt and clipped.

Tifa nodded to me. Elena looked like she wanted to say something, but Tseng jerked me away from the table and toward the back exit, then into the alley.

"Boss?" I asked, noticing the dark-haired man was looking everywhere but at me. He maneuvered me until my back was pressed against a building. "S-sir?"

Brown eyes full of heat met my stunned gaze. "Yes, Reno?"

I watched him carefully. "What do we need ta discuss?"

He smiled darkly at me.

I wasn't sure if I liked that darkness or not until his lips descended on mine with enough force to bruise. I opened my mouth against him, his tongue sliding inside to claim every inch of the territory. My hands moved of their own accord, one lacing deep into the black silk of his hair and the other snaking around him to hold him closer.

He drew back, evidently a little startled by my reaction, and caught his breath.

I smiled at him and tugged his lips back to mine. It was my turn to taste him this time, and I was gentler than he had been with me, but by no means was I hesitant. Using my tongue, I tasted every single part of his mouth, learning what he liked and memorizing his reactions.

"You taste good," I told him when I finally drew back long enough for a breath.

Pink rose to his pale cheeks. "So do you."

I had to force myself to unwind my arms and release him. He took a step back, unpinning me. I stepped forward until I was able to touch him again. "Ya wanna go somewhere, Tseng?"

A carnal smile stretched across perfect lips and I took it as a yes.

"My place is less than a block from here," I offered, slightly unsure in a way I hadn't been in a very long time.

He smile softened, like he could read me like a book. He kissed my lips soundly.

"Well, then. Let's get going before we end up havin' sex in the alley." I grinned.

Our progress stuttered, because we stopped every few seconds to kiss, to touch, to embrace. The usually brief, five-minute walk took more like twenty.

We finally stumbled up the stairs in the midst of a kiss. I half-tripped as I backed up the stairs, digging my keys out of my pocket then groping for the doorknob and somehow unlocking the door, all the while refusing to break our kiss.

When the door opened behind me –he'd pressed me against it to ravage my lips once more– I fell back into my apartment, laughing breathily but reaching for him again. He followed me in, laughing softly, and helped me up before kicking the door closed behind him.

I took his hand and tugged him toward my bedroom, not hesitant for even an instant to show this man my sanctuary. My home had always been off limits to my lovers. Anywhere else was fine, but my home was precious. Perhaps that should be a personal hint to me that he would never be just 'a lover'.

My bedroom walls were a pale green with cream accents, and my king-sized bed –draped in luxuriant black bedding– dominated the space. I wasn't sure if Tseng had expected something like it. I mean, the man could probably see right through me, but there are some things that aren't hidden deep inside of me that people easily overlook.

Tseng surveyed the room silently, briefly, before coming to me again, his arms wrapping around me and his lips pressing gently against mine. It seemed he realized just by looking at my room exactly what it meant for me to have brought him here. I relaxed into him and kissed him back, working on the buttons of his shirt and pausing briefly to shove his suit jacket down his arms. I went back to unbuttoning his shirt as he maneuvered his suit jacket down his arms. Finishing with his buttons, I swiftly untied his tie and slid it off his neck, tossing it to the floor.

He stepped back, pulling away to catch a breath. "Be patient, Reno."

_I love how he says my name!_

"I don't do patient, yo," I murmured back, untucking his shirt from his pants and yanking the tails in a manner that efficiently thrust the shirt down his arms.

Heat glimmered in his dark eyes as he watched me, stripping his shirt the rest of the way off purposefully before yanking me against him and kissing me hard. My breath caught in my throat as he caressed my aching cock through the thin material of my uniform slacks. He stroked harder, and a moan bubbled out of my throat and into his mouth. My blunt, dull mails sunk into his shoulders. A sweet, pleasure-filled rumble rose from deep in his chest.

Suddenly, his hands were working overtime at forcing my jacket down my arms. Usually graceful fingers fumbled with the buttons of my shirt as I worked my jacket the rest of the way off my arms. Frustrated, Tseng gave up and ripped my shirt open. Buttons scattered with a skittering noise on the hardwood floor, but we paid them no mind as pressed forward, stepping into me. To each of his steps forward, I took a step backward, still working my way out of my ruined uniform shirt while kissing Tseng, fingertips tingling to touch him.

The shirt dropped to the floor and I stumbled backwards onto my bed. He chuckled at my startled expression and climbed onto the bed to straddle my hips and kiss my lips. As soon as his soft lips met mine, I ground my hips against him, starting a moan out of the usually stoic man. My lips quirked into a satisfied smile against his and my hands snuck down to bare more for them to explore.

Tseng drew back a little, trailing his lips along my jaw line to my ear. Yet I was still a little startled when he bit my earlobe. I shuddered. "It isn't a race, Reno," he told me, his breath ghosting over my skin.

"But I've wanted you forever," I told him, smiling softly as him as I caressed his cheek with one hand.

He blushed lightly.

_Oh, there it is again. I was starting to think I imagined it earlier._

"It's not been 'forever'," he corrected.

"Felt like it to me, yo. You were so… untouchable and yet unbearably close at times."

Tseng drew back to give me a small smile, similar sentiments to the ones I'd just expressed just barely mirrored in his eyes even as he asked, "Can we talk later?" Then he thrust against me and I growled in pleasure before rolling him beneath me, his lean muscular legs wrapping around my waist in the transition. His silky jet-colored hair, loosened sometime during our play, splayed beneath him like a dark halo as he watched me, hunger shining in his beautiful eyes.

"So, you're gay." I had to state the obvious, but it was mostly because it had been the biggest bombshell of my evening.

"I'm bisexual, actually," he corrected.

"Ever had sex with a guy?" I waggled my brows to imply 'more than oral'.

"No, I haven't."

"You wanna?"

That pretty blush was back and it made him look so cute! He nodded.

"Give or take?"

He thought about it a moment, the blush darkening. "Fuck me, Reno," he purred out finally, the seductive tone not entirely negated by his embarrassment.

_Mm, that voice makes me hot,_ I thought somewhere in the back of my mind. The rest of my mind was occupied with… well… sexing him up. I nibbled on his earlobe to hear him inhale sharply. That was the thing about noises during sex. They are part of the satisfaction, because something deep inside you purrs like a contented house cat to know you made them moan, scream, or gasp.

At least, if you're doing it right.

We were both getting there, either way. He was panting, eager and perhaps a bit scared, I presume. I kissed him again, my hands working down his chest, tweaking his nipples and stroking the thin trail of black chest hair to his waist band. My lips soon followed the same path my hands had taken as my hands undid his pants and began to work them and his boxers down his thighs and off him completely.

I hovered just over his swollen cock as it jutted to attention, giving him a little teasing attention by flicking my tongue out to taste him. His hips moved involuntarily toward my mouth and I smiled darkly. Remembering Elena's remark, I took him into my mouth. Because of her, I was going to make it my mission to render him unable to form a grammatically correct sentence.

I worked the remaining pieces of my clothes off, bobbing my head and sucking on him all the while. He made a sweet keening noise and I smiled, using one hand to cup and gently squeeze his balls. His moan was loud and he thrust into my mouth, nearly gagging me. I managed to back off just before he did and give him a look of warning before returning to him, using one hand to hold down his hips to avoid further incidents.

Humming softly to myself, I drew him deeper, smiling at the sweet noises he made. They were just making things harder on me, but I had to admit that I loved them, all the same.

I released his cock, then crawled up his body, careful to rub every inch of myself against his straining cock. I kissed his lips softly, then sucked on his pulse point.

"Tseng?" I asked softly against his skin.

"Mmm?" he returned.

"How far do you wanna go?" I sucked on the skin a little harder than before.

"A-a-ah! Reno … ooh … need you…!"

I smiled against his skin. Victory was mine.

I inched back down his body. He made another incredibly hot sound at the friction, and I slowly slid my hand back to slide a slick finger into him. He moaned again, louder than before, and involuntarily moved back against my hand, my finger burying deeper inside him.

I gave a wicked little smile. _Well, well. It seems he's not new to this part of it. Which means he probably masturbates this way._ Still smiling, I slid a second finger into his tight heat, stretching him further. He gasped as I worked them inside of him; I was looking for that one spot that would blow away all of his discomfort and make preparing him easier of him.

The noise he made was too hot for words. I counted myself damn lucky that I hadn't come in my pants when he made it, but I also knew exactly what that sound meant: I had found it. _And judging by that sound, no one else has found that spot before._ I finished preparing him quickly, brushing against it each time. He met each thrust of my finger with his hips.

He whimpered in loss when I withdrew my fingers and I had to hold myself back from taking him as hard and fast as I could. Instead, I kissed his ear, trembling at the effort of holding myself back. "Are you ready, Tseng?" I purred out. It came out a lot breathier than I would have likes, but it seemed to do the trick.

He shivered visibly and brought his lips to mine. He arched forward, rolling his hips against mine in a mindless, silent demand. I consented to it, roughly slicking myself with the bottle of lube on the nightstand before thrusting deeply into him. I gave him a few moments to get used to the feeling of having someone inside of him. He moved his hips again, demanding motion without words, and I complied with slow, deep thrusts. I increased my pace gradually, kissing his face and surging forward until he gasped loudly and I knew I'd relocated that special spot.

From then on out, I made every thrust hit that spot and my very reserved superior was crying out under me and leaving tracks down my back with his nails. After a particularly hard thrust, he cried out my name quite loudly and I held back a satisfied smile and kissed his lips before thrusting forward again, just as hard. He screamed out my name and came hard, his come coating my stomach as his heat clenched around me. I soon followed, biting his shoulder to muffle my sound, but Tseng could still tell it was his name on my lips.

I collapsed over him, panting hard but trying to catch my breath as I pulled out of him. He startled me by pressing a sweet, lazy kiss to my lips. I smiled –a real smile, not the usual snarky, sarcastic one I send his way– and gazed upon his unguarded, happy but worn-out expression, then rolled off of him to curl against his warmth.

* * *

_Reno:_

For once, I got to work before the ever-prompt Elena. It might have had something to do with the fact I had awoken with my always-early boss and we'd come in together.

Smirking as I passed her desk, I had to double back and scribble a note on a post-it for her:

_Lena-  
I was right. And he is fucking __hot__ when he can't even form a sentence, let me tell you.  
Sucks to be you._

* * *

_Tseng:_

I picked up the note Reno stuck on Elena's desk, curious as to what it might be about that it would leave such a mischievous expression on his face.

I read it quickly and felt shock turn my blood to ice in my veins.

Just what in the hell had Elena been saying that provoked such a reaction from him? What did it make last night? Did he even want me, or was he just trying to prove a point to my infatuated underling?

_Don't get ahead of yourself,_ I cautioned myself. _There's probably some really dumb explanation for the entire thing._

So, like nothing at all was out of the ordinary, I picked up the note and looked at the man –_sexy redheaded pain-in-the ass, and a more literal one this morning_– who was sprawled in what can only be referred to as 'Reno-style' in a chair. "What's this?" I asked him.

"It's just a personal note," he returned, standing up and coming to me, wrapping his arms around me, his arousal pressing against me –_fuck, twice already this morning and he's up for more?_ He kissed the sensitive spot just beneath my ear.

"W-what about?" I asked, my stutter shaming me to no end.

I felt his lips quirk against my skin. "Grammar."

* * *

**_Review, and fill that empty place in the author's heart that longs for your love, lol_**


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